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Cultivative Counseling

  • April 27, 2023

    Communication Styles – Four Patterns of Communication and their Impact

    We all engage in patterns of communication that are influenced by how we think and feel, and that influence our behavior in the interaction we share with others. There are four often talked about styles of communication that are important to have an understanding of. Passive Communication Passive communication is a style in which individuals…

  • March 30, 2023

    Time Outs: They’re Not Just for Kids, Adults Can Benefit from them Too

    I’ve often had clients identify the absence of arguments as evidence that their relationships are healthy. Clients often develop goals for their relationships based in the belief that happy couples do not argue; and in my work with clients this belief has presented challenges to their ability to develop (and strengthen) skills for open and…

  • March 2, 2023

    What are Healthy Boundaries and How to Practice Them

    Personal boundaries are the limits and rules that we set for ourselves within our relationships. These rules and limits support our ability to function effectively within these relationships and in our everyday lives. We often talk about unhealthy boundaries and set goals for developing healthy ones. Knowing what the characteristics of unhealthy boundaries are can…

  • January 27, 2023

    The 5 Love Languages Revisited

    Valentines Day is coming up and that day has always been a favorite of mine, because I’ve always found joy in having a day where we are all (well, a lot of us) are extra intentional about communicating the love that we share to others. With that in mind, I thought that it would be…

  • January 12, 2023

    A Therapist’s Experiences with Finding a Therapist (+6 Tips)

    At the start of a new year, it is a common practice for us to set goals and intentions and create visions for the year, with hopes that the next 12 months will be better than the last. For a lot of people, the desire to experience “different” leads them to exploring therapy.  The idea…

  • August 8, 2022

    The 5 Stages of Grief

    Working through grief is not a linear process, and everyone’s grief journey may be different. With that understood, there are 5 stages that commonly mark our progression through the grief process. Having knowledge of the characteristics of each stage can be helpful to understanding the whats and whys of your or another’s feelings, and this…

  • June 19, 2022

    10 Effective Refusal Skills

    Refusal Skills are the tools and techniques we use to reinforce our “No.” I enjoy teaching refusal skills and encouraging my clients to look beyond the word no, when establishing and reinforcing their boundaries. Here are some things to consider when exploring and evaluating the sources of peer pressure you have experienced/are experiencing, and how…

  • May 23, 2022

    The 5 Stages of Change

    Educating my clients on the Stages of Change is an important building block of my working relationships with them, especially because my clients’ success in completing the program is heavily dependent on their willingness and ability to change. Below are examples of how I describe each stage to my clients and examples of how they…

  • April 23, 2022

    Responding with I-Statements for Effective Conflict Resolution

    In a previous post I discussed the ways in which using I-Statements to express yourself may be helpful in preventing the escalation of conflict with others. Here are some examples of how to use the I-Statement template as shared in that post: The template statement is as follows: I feel (emotion) when/because (trigger). Here are some examples: I feel sad when I can’t…

  • April 9, 2022

    Using I-Statements for Effective Conflict Resolution

    One of the primary goals of effective conflict resolution is to de-escalate a situation that has potential to become tense and at an extreme, explosive. There are many ways to de-escalate conflict; however I-Statements are effective because they assist with expressing your feelings without placing blame and triggering defenses. One thing I love about teaching…

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